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View Full Version : Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck?



PoliCon
01-13-2010, 05:22 PM
Here is a little test that will help you decide.. (remember, this is for humor only; don't get all bent out of shape).

The answer can be found by posing the following question:



Here is the situation:


You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.

Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.

You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

QUESTION:


What do you do?










THINK CAREFULLY AND THEN SCROLL DOWN . . . .









Democrat's Answer :



















Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!
I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.



.................................................. .................................................. .

Republican's Answer:















BANG!






.................................................. .................................................. .

Redneck's Answer:




BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG !
Click . . . (Sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click……

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hydrashocks?"

Son: "Can I shoot the next one?"

Wife: "You ain't taking that to the taxidermist!"

Teetop
01-13-2010, 06:05 PM
Redneck, for sure.

LOL!

Bongo55
01-13-2010, 06:20 PM
Wow, I guess I didn't want to admit this to myself. But I guess I'm a redneck, except for the taxidermist. :)

enslaved1
01-14-2010, 12:38 AM
Republican. I have no issue defending myself and my family, but I don't take joy in anyone's life ending.

Speedy
01-14-2010, 01:15 AM
Republican. I have no issue defending myself and my family, but I don't take joy in anyone's life ending.

The only time I ever shot someone that died, I was pissed off. Pissed off that it took him three years to finally kick the bucket. He was paralyzed from the the moment I shot him until he died from complications of it later. He was in a wheelchair that whole time so I guess it counts for something.

Articulate_Ape
01-14-2010, 01:58 AM
It would depend on how he was holding the knife as to what technique I would employ to disarm him before I made him hospital-ready for the cops.

noonwitch
01-14-2010, 02:46 PM
In that case, I'm a republican. Why waste bullets if I'm a crack shot?

PoliCon
01-14-2010, 03:57 PM
In that case, I'm a republican. Why waste bullets if I'm a crack shot?

My thoughts as well - especially with all the taxes etc the dems wanna put on ammo to make it harder to get . . .

linda22003
01-14-2010, 03:58 PM
The only time I ever shot someone that died, I was pissed off. Pissed off that it took him three years to finally kick the bucket. He was paralyzed from the the moment I shot him until he died from complications of it later. He was in a wheelchair that whole time so I guess it counts for something.

I'm sorry to hear you were inconvenienced.

Speedy
01-14-2010, 04:40 PM
I'm sorry to hear you were inconvenienced.

You do not know the half of it. It sucks not being able to set foot in Mexico for more than a couple of hours before having people show up looking to collect by handing over your head in a sack.

Funny how some people just can't let go of some things and put them in the past. For God's sake people, the guy is dead. Why argue and stir up ill will over who killed who and what not?

Rockntractor
01-14-2010, 04:42 PM
In that case, I'm a republican. Why waste bullets if I'm a crack shot?

I will take measures to protect my crack around you!:eek:

PoliCon
01-14-2010, 04:58 PM
I will take measures to protect my crack around you!:eek:

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/picture/hankendale/CrackKills.png