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Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 08:10 PM
Asking a bar to “bail out” your tab doesn’t work.
Trust me.

http://i37.tinypic.com/5wdpgx.jpg

Consider building your own still.
All you need to do is read a couple books, get the parts, find a welder you can trust, mix up some mash and, uh — that ain’t gonna happen.

If your career choices mean you are utterly unaffected by the current economic crisis, feel free to revel in schadenfreude. You’re not a lowlife barfly, you’re a recession-resistant barfly.

Don’t think tipping less will solve your financial problems. It will, however, solve your “Wow, that’s a proper goddamn pour” problems.

Instead of spreading your money around, spend all your dough at one bar. Regulars get benefits.

If your home is about to get repossessed, make sure you throw one last kick-out-the-jams party before you go. And by jams I mean windows.

Utilize the barter system. Perhaps your bartender is willing to trade liquor for insincere compliments.

If you notice your local bar pouring weak to save money, make a stand. Let out a loud and long horrified wail as if they’re strangling the sweet baby Jesus right in front of you. Do this enough times and they’ll eventually understand that we’re all in this together.

You can no longer say you “feel like a million bucks” while loaded. That kind of ostentatiousness doesn’t play anymore. Just say you “feel like a couple hundred bucks, I guess, give or take.”

Liquor stores are not always a better deal than bars.When was the last time a liquor store comped part of your bill?

You can wheedle free drinks out of the bartender by telling him you just got laid off. And in this kooky economy, it’s entirely possible you’ll get laid off more than once a week.

I'm tired of having my collie dog argue with Satan Pants. It's Friday! How do you save on liquor? And BTW - what are you doing, wearing, drinking, eating, watching, or avoiding tonight?

Modern Drunkard (http://www.drunkard.com/issues/55/55-boozing-bad-times.html)

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 08:14 PM
I'm tired of having my collie dog argue with Satan Pants. It's Friday! How do you save on liquor? And BTW - what are you doing, wearing, drinking, eating, watching, or avoiding tonight?

Modern Drunkard (http://www.drunkard.com/issues/55/55-boozing-bad-times.html)

I'm wearing an Italian military workout suit, I'm drinking a Dr. Pepper throwback and just finished eating a lamburger.

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 08:17 PM
I'm wearing an elephant-themed tropical shirt, shorts, and flip-flops. I'm drinking a Sam Adams Summer Ale, viewing the birds , and defrosting a rack of ribs for tomorrow. :D

Arroyo_Doble
08-13-2010, 08:21 PM
I'm tired of having my collie dog argue with Satan Pants. It's Friday! How do you save on liquor? And BTW - what are you doing, wearing, drinking, eating, watching, or avoiding tonight?

Modern Drunkard (http://www.drunkard.com/issues/55/55-boozing-bad-times.html)

I am enjoying a Sierra Nevada pale ale, not eating so I won't get fat from the beer, avoiding a spreadsheet that I have to have ready by Monday morning, getting ready to watch the Rangers spank the Red Sox, and I am wearing kakhi pants, green shirt (buttoned all the way up), hiking boots and New Balance socks.

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 08:55 PM
I'm wearing grey t-shirt and black running shorts and fuzzy slippers.

Drinking cheap scotch.

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 09:13 PM
They aren't animal slippers, are they?

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 09:14 PM
They aren't animal slippers, are they?

NO....I mean ...no.

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 09:20 PM
Well, moving on.......

Articulate_Ape
08-13-2010, 09:21 PM
I want my own still.

/me jots this down.

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 09:21 PM
Well, moving on.......

Did you just fart?:eek:

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 09:25 PM
I'm listening to Charlie Daniels and ignoring Rock.

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 09:26 PM
I'm listening to Charlie Daniels and ignoring Rock.

I knew you did!:D

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 09:38 PM
I'm still ignoring Rock. Now I'm wearing a crinkle cotton wrap and annoying the neighbors.

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 09:40 PM
I'm still ignoring Rock. Now I'm wearing a crinkle cotton wrap and annoying the neighbors.

They can hear it?:confused::eek:

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 09:42 PM
I knew you did!:D

Ginger doesn't fart. She has the vapors.

Do try to keep up....:cool:

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 09:43 PM
They can hear it?:confused::eek:

Even distant neighbors can hear if she pops a bubble in bubble wrap.

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 09:43 PM
Ginger doesn't fart. She has the vapors.

Do try to keep up....:cool:

Yeah and it's to the point of annoying her neighbors! I wonder how close they live?:confused:

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 09:47 PM
Yeah and it's to the point of annoying her neighbors! I wonder how close they live?:confused:

She can see their moo moos and they can hear her pass....bubble wrap...:rolleyes:

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 09:50 PM
They can hear it?:confused::eek:

You bet - I've got it cranked up. The hippies are now listening to 'Drinking My Baby Goodbye'. :D

malloc
08-13-2010, 09:55 PM
Ugh, later I might have some bourbon, maybe Booker's or Old Van Winkle's but right now it's too hot. I just got home from work to realize that I bumped the switch that turns my AC off this morning before I left. The kids were at school, the wife was gone all day, and my house just baked. It's 94 degrees downstairs right now. Swampass factor 7.


I have a friend who comes from a big family in Kentucky. He has a still and uses it occasionally. I tried some of it and expected it to taste like hell, but it was actually, really good. Not anything at all like what I expected.

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 10:01 PM
You bet - I've got it cranked up. The hippies are now listening to 'Drinking My Baby Goodbye'. :D
That should drown out the popping sounds.

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 10:11 PM
That should drown out the popping sounds.

Snap...crinkle...pop....Rice Krispies, right? :confused:

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 10:12 PM
That should drown out the popping sounds.

You mean the .22 shots for those pigs? It doesn't hurt them but they do squeal. :p

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 10:15 PM
You mean the .22 shots for those pigs? It doesn't hurt them but they do squeal. :p

:eek:

I mean.....

:eek:

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 10:15 PM
You mean the .22 shots for those pigs? It doesn't hurt them but they do squeal. :p

.22 phooey! Mosquito bites with this thick hide!:D

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 10:19 PM
:eek:

I mean.....

:eek:

Let's get back to sipping, laughing, and shooting pigs.


Oops. :p

Rockntractor
08-13-2010, 10:24 PM
Oops. :p
Hah hah popped again!:D

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 10:26 PM
Hah hah popped again!:D

It's like 7th grade all over again. Except without the booze and sex.

Bubba Dawg
08-13-2010, 10:28 PM
Let's get back to sipping, laughing, and shooting pigs.


Oops. :p

okay....okay...

sipping....laughing and we'll forget about your flatul....um....yeah...nice...,..

:p:D

Gingersnap
08-13-2010, 11:46 PM
okay....okay...

sipping....laughing and we'll forget about your flatul....um....yeah...nice...,..

:p:D

Women don't "eject" on any level aside from childbirth.

RobJohnson
08-13-2010, 11:57 PM
I just got home from work and I'm wearing my work clothes. It was a long afternoon at work. Last night I woke up to a violent explosion of vomit & did not feel good for several hours. :p:p

I'm drinking a low-cal Gatorade.

Rockntractor
08-14-2010, 10:04 PM
Okay let's resurrect Gingers evening thread, it's boring as hell around here!:cool:

PoliCon
08-14-2010, 10:28 PM
4c totally light red tea peach

RobJohnson
08-14-2010, 10:29 PM
I've taken several naps today and now I'm hungry.

Rockntractor
08-14-2010, 10:42 PM
Just finished eating a delicious lamb chop with mashed potatoes an super sweet corn. My eyes are burning from all the dang dust today, we need rain.

RobJohnson
08-14-2010, 10:47 PM
Just finished eating a delicious lamb chop with mashed potatoes an super sweet corn. My eyes are burning from all the dang dust today, we need rain.

We could use some rain here also. The pine trees are drying out and the needles are everywhere!