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Odysseus
12-02-2010, 09:48 AM
ROFLOL for about five full minutes when I saw this. Does that make me a bad person?

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y205/Tui717/pu1p3ehapnr0olji9lknpbo.jpg

obx
12-02-2010, 09:51 AM
Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? Neither has she.

Teddy Kennedy
12-02-2010, 09:51 AM
Coffee out the nose funny.

NJCardFan
12-02-2010, 09:53 AM
Why did Helen Keller's dog jump off a cliff? You would too if your name was arghrgarghr.

Teddy Kennedy
12-02-2010, 09:57 AM
Why did Helen Keller's dog jump off a cliff? You would too if your name was arghrgarghr.

Wrong, funny as hell but wrong.

Bailey
12-02-2010, 10:10 AM
I thought you were refering to KS or we we :(


If we laugh at these jokes does that mean we are going to hell?

Gingersnap
12-02-2010, 10:13 AM
If we laugh at these jokes does that mean we are going to hell?

Absolutely!


What was Helen Keller's favorite color?


Corduroy.

Odysseus
12-02-2010, 11:37 AM
This is a visual joke. Make a few gestures with your hand, then let it go limp and thump onto a table. Then say that it's Helen Keller's last words. :D

Also, if Helen Keller were alone in a forest, and fell down, would she make a sound?

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They rearranged the furniture.

How did they punish her if she was really bad?
They left the plunger in the toilet.

Why did Helen Keller wear yellow socks?
Her dog was blind, too.

Gingersnap
12-02-2010, 01:01 PM
What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder?



Endless love.

noonwitch
12-02-2010, 01:08 PM
What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder?



Endless love.


LOL. I'm sharing that one with my coworkers.

Odysseus
12-02-2010, 03:34 PM
What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder?
Endless love.
LOL.

What happened when Helen Keller fell down a well?

She screamed her arms off.


LOL. I'm sharing that one with my coworkers.

Wait a minute, don't you work with hypersensitive social worker types? Are you sure that you want to share this joke? You could end up remanded to additional sensitivity training. :eek: Oh, the humanity!

hampshirebrit
12-02-2010, 03:53 PM
I'm sorta wincing and smirking at the same time with this thread. More wincing than smirking, really.

Helen Keller's first dog was given her by a Japanese in 1938. It was an Akita, named Kamikaze-Go. All sorts of comic potential there, I guess.

Odysseus
12-02-2010, 05:24 PM
I'm sorta wincing and smirking at the same time with this thread. More wincing than smirking, really.

Helen Keller's first dog was given her by a Japanese in 1938. It was an Akita, named Kamikaze-Go. All sorts of comic potential there, I guess.

A dog named for divine wind? Don't get me started...

Gingersnap
12-02-2010, 09:05 PM
I'm sorta wincing and smirking at the same time with this thread. More wincing than smirking, really.

Helen Keller's first dog was given her by a Japanese in 1938. It was an Akita, named Kamikaze-Go. All sorts of comic potential there, I guess.

Why did Helen Keller always wear yellow socks?


Her dog was blind, too.


Helen Keller jokes are a staple of juvenile American humor, Hamps. I'm sure there's some equally insensitive Brit equivalent. I'm still remember Dead Baby jokes. Times do change but gross or malicious humor lives on. ;)

Bubba Dawg
12-02-2010, 09:32 PM
Okay, you want juvenile?

How did Helen Keller break her wrist?

Reading a stop sign.....

Bubba Dawg
12-02-2010, 09:38 PM
This is worse....

If Helen keller falls in the woods, does she make a noise?

Gingersnap
12-02-2010, 09:41 PM
What did Helen Keller say when someone handed her a cheesegrater?


"That's the most violent story I've ever read!"

Bubba Dawg
12-02-2010, 09:43 PM
What did Helen Keller say when someone handed her a cheesegrater?


"That's the most violent story I've ever read!"

:D

Helen Keller went to town
A riding on a pony
Stuck a feather in her hat
And called it....waaaaaa....waaaa.waaaa.......

Bubba Dawg
12-02-2010, 09:57 PM
Okay, this may be the worst......

Why did Helen Keller only masturbate with only one hand?

She needed the other hand to moan......

CueSi
12-02-2010, 10:00 PM
Okay, this may be the worst......

Why did Helen Keller only masturbate with only one hand?

She needed the other hand to moan......

Hell is hot, Bubba.

~QC

Gingersnap
12-02-2010, 10:01 PM
Why didn't Helen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff?


She was wearing mittens.

Bubba Dawg
12-02-2010, 10:08 PM
Hell is hot, Bubba.

~QC

:D

m00
12-02-2010, 11:00 PM
I don't get it, there are computer interface devices made specifically for the blind. Hell, I knew a blind programmer once.

noonwitch
12-03-2010, 09:03 AM
LOL.

What happened when Helen Keller fell down a well?

She screamed her arms off.



Wait a minute, don't you work with hypersensitive social worker types? Are you sure that you want to share this joke? You could end up remanded to additional sensitivity training. :eek: Oh, the humanity!



We work in Children's Services. You can't be hypersensitive and work here long. Once you figure out the Benedryl thing, you can even sleep again.

Odysseus
12-03-2010, 10:02 AM
I don't get it, there are computer interface devices made specifically for the blind. Hell, I knew a blind programmer once.
http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb103/moostrength/smilies/th_Head-bangAgainstWall.gif (http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb103/moostrength/smilies/Head-bangAgainstWall.gif)

:D

Helen Keller went to town
A riding on a pony
Stuck a feather in her hat
And called it....waaaaaa....waaaa.waaaa.......
I just read that out loud in the DMOC. Fortunately, I'm the senior officer present at the moment, but the other MAJs and the NCOs were on the floor.

We work in Children's Services. You can't be hypersensitive and work here long. Once you figure out the Benedryl thing, you can even sleep again.
I prefer single malt scotch to Benedryl. You still sneeze, but you don't care.

obx
12-03-2010, 10:36 AM
How did Helen Keller burn her hand? Trying to read the waffel iron.

Odysseus
12-03-2010, 11:25 AM
How did Helen Keller burn her ear?
She answered the iron.

How'd she burn her other ear?
The bastard called back.

Why did Helen Keller have blisters on her fingers?
She took the Evelyn Wood Speed Reading Course.

What did Helen Keller say when she passed the fish market?
"Hello, ladies."

Why didn't Helen Keller skydive?
It scared the crap out of her dog.

Apache
12-03-2010, 01:23 PM
You guys are evil...






:D

Odysseus
12-04-2010, 10:14 AM
You guys are evil...

:D

Yes, but in a good way. :D