View Full Version : World’s First ‘Smart Condom’ Tracks Speed, Calories Burned During Sex

03-04-2017, 05:27 PM
The self-described “world’s first smart condom,” i.Con, allows users to track their speed, velocity, and caloric burn during sexual intercourse.

“Have you ever wondered how many calories you’re burning during intercourse?” asks i.Con on their product page. “How many thrusts? Speed of your thrusts? The duration of your sessions? Frequency? How many different positions you use in the period of a week, month or year? Ever wondered how you stack up to other people from around the world?”

“Welcome to the future of wearable technology in the bedroom. Welcome to i.Con,” their advertising copy continues. “Utilizing a Nano-chip and sensors, i.Con will measure and remember a number of different variables during your sessions. Once your session is completed, you will then be able to use the i.Con app to download your recent data which is paired to the device using Bluetooth technology. Once you have downloaded your data, the i.Con will automatically clear its memory, making way for your next session. It’s extremely simple to use


03-04-2017, 05:57 PM
But why?

03-04-2017, 07:53 PM
A standard condom is smarter than a liberal.

DumbAss Tanker
03-04-2017, 10:27 PM
The 'Smart' part with any condom happens with deciding whether or not you're going to use one at all, and where the thing it's wrapped around is gonna go. Nobody gives a rat's hindquarters about that other stuff once they've made those two decisions.

03-06-2017, 10:20 AM
"Everybody knows that the scene is dead
but there's going to be a meter on your bed
that will disclose
what everybody knows"

Leonard Cohen.