"What's shaking Norm?"
"All four cheeks & a couple of chins."

"What's new Normie?"
"Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach & they're demanding beer."

"What'd you like Normie?"
"A reason to live. Give me another beer."

"What'll you have Normie?"
"Well, I'm in a gambling mood Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of the tap."

"Hey Norm, how's the world been treating you?"
"Like a baby treats a diaper."

"What's the story Mr. Peterson?"
"The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to the happy ending."

"Hey Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you."
"I know, if she calls, I'm not here."

"Beer, Norm?"
"Have I gotten that predictable? Good."

"What's going on Mr. Peterson?"
"A flashing sign in my gut that says, 'Insert beer here.'"

"Whatcha up to Norm?"
"My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall."

"How's it going Mr. Peterson?"
"Poor."
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"No, I mean pour."

"How's life treating you Norm?"
"Like it caught me sleeping with its wife."

"Women. Can't live with 'em....pass the beer nuts."

"What's going down, Normie?"
"My butt cheeks on that bar stool."

"Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?"
"Alright, but stop me at one....make that one-thirty."

"How's it going Mr. Peterson?"
"It's a dog eat dog world, Woody & I'm wearing Milk Bone underwear."

"What's the story Norm?"
"Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer."

"What's going on Mr. Peterson?"
"The question is what's going IN Mr. Peterson? A beer please, Woody."

"Can I pour you a beer Mr. Peterson?"
"A little early isn't it, Woody?"
"For a beer?"
"No, for stupid questions."