Thread: My poilce story

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  1. #1 My poilce story 
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    I have a ton of police run ins.

    Here is just one...for now.

    I was on my way home from my dads, and was passing a Chase bank where I use to keep money, I have a account there that I want to close, so I stop to do so.

    I tell the teller I want to close my account, she says I can't, and have to come back wed. ..I say , NO ...I want to close it NOW, she refuses, I raise my voice and tell her off....then leave.

    I get home, and after a few minutes of telling my wife I wasn't allowed to close my account when I see 3 cop cars pull up in front of my house.

    I go to the door and ask what they are doing. They say...

    "Were you just at this bank?"

    I say YES I was.

    They said they were there to arrest me because I threw a pen at the lady.

    I said what ? ...I never threw a pen.. The cop shouted back..

    "I saw the video tape sir"

    I was shocked, because I knew I NEVER threw a pen, so I replied...

    "Are you telling me that the video shows me throwing a pen at that lady?"

    his reply

    "Well, it doesn't show that, but you DID raise your voice."

    I then EXPLODED..

    "{yelling} ..,.I am raising my voice right fucking now, why don't you tape it ..get the fuck off my property you stupid fucking assholes, I will own you retards if you don't leave right fucking now.

    They wrote me a ticket for throwing a pen at a lady....battery charge

    I went to court and told the judge,..

    "If this isn't thrown out today, my lawyer will subpoena the vidoe tape and I will be in here asking for his badge."

    The judge shot a look over to the officer...

    And 6 seconds later it was tossed out.
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  2. #2  
    CU's Tallest Midget! PoliCon's Avatar
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    Nice try. Total bouncy.
    Stand up for what is right, even if you have to stand alone.
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  3. #3  
    Power CUer FlaGator's Avatar
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    You should have posted that on DU. It would have ended here sooner or later.

    I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.
    C. S. Lewis
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  4. #4  
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    Even though this is extremely bouncy, why not treat the teller with a little more respect. Just cause you hate you life, don't take it out on others you douche.
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  5. #5  
    Sonnabend
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    1. You forgot the "so" at the start.

    2. My bullshit meter just exploded.
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  6. #6  
    Senior Member Linda's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by satanica View Post
    I have a ton of police run ins.


    I don't think that surprises anyone on this forum....l
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  7. #7  
    PORCUS MAXIMUS Rockntractor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by satanica View Post
    I have a ton of police run ins.

    Here is just one...for now.

    So I was on my way home from one of my dads, and was passing a pawn shop Quick cash where I use to keep money, I had a a pay day loan there that I wanted to pay off, so I stopped to do so.

    I told the pawn broker I wanted to pay and get my tv back she says I can't, and have to come back wed. ..I say , NO ...I want tmy tv NOW, she refuses, I raise my voice and tell her off....then leave.

    I get home, and after a few minutes of telling my wife I wasn't allowed to get my tv when I see 3 cop cars pull up in front of my house.

    I go to the door and ask what they are doing. They say...

    "Were you just at this pawn shop?"

    I say YES I was.

    They said they were there to arrest me because I threw a butt plug at the lady.

    I said what ? ...I never threw a butt plug.. The cop shouted back..

    "I saw the video tape sir"

    I was shocked, because I knew I NEVER threw a butt plug, so I replied...

    "Are you telling me that the video shows me throwing a butt plug at that lady?"

    his reply

    "Well, it doesn't show that, but you DID raise your voice."

    I then cried..

    "{sobbing} ..,.I am raising my voice right fucking now, why don't you quit picking on me ..get the fuck off my property you stupid meanie pants, I wan't one of my daddys leave right fucking now.

    They wrote me a ticket for throwing a butt plug at a lady....battery charge

    I went to court and told the judge,..

    "If this isn't thrown out today, my lawyer will subpoena the vidoe tape and I will be in here asking for his badge."

    The judge shot a look over to the officer and he took me in the back room and did a cavity search that I enjoyed very much!
    And 6 seconds later I was tossed out.
    Fixed!
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  8. #8  
    Senior Member stsinner's Avatar
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    They must have had a shortage of one dollar bills that day... What a fag..

    You're such a tough guy, satanica.. Please, tell us more stories of jackassery.

    Funny thing-I don't have any stories of run-ins with the cops..
    Obama-if you're being run out of town, get out in front and pretend that it's a parade!!!
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  9. #9  
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  10. #10  
    Super Moderator BadCat's Avatar
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    Damn man, why didn't you take out your "Rage Against The Machine" guitar hero guitar, whack him in the face with it, knock that ugly hat the Chicago cops wear onto the ground and get out your official "Obumble Chess Set" (the one with Obumble as King, Pelosi as Queen and the American People as pawns) and play a game on that stupid checkerboard hatband on his hat?

    rm -rf obama*
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