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  1. #1 Blonde Policewoman 
    Senior Member aerojarod's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Blue State
    A blonde policewoman pulls over a driver for speeding. She approaches the car and asks the driver, also a blonde woman, for her license and registration. The blonde driver rummages through her purse for several moments looking for her drivers license.

    "Hurry up, Miss" says the officer, becoming impatient.

    "Sorry, officer-" says the driver, "I can't' seem to find it. Could you tell me what it looks like?"

    "Ma'am, your license is small, rectangular, and has a picture of you on it," replies the annoyed officer.

    The blonde driver digs through her purse one last time, pulls out her make-up compact, opens it, and hands it to the officer.

    "Here's my license," the driver says.

    The blonde officer looks at the compact, hands it back to the driver and say, "Sorry, I didn't realize you were a cop, too. You can be on your way."

    "Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people.
    It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other."
    -- John Adams
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  2. #2 A Guy Goes Into A Bar 
    Join Date
    May 2008
    A guy goes into a bar, sits down and notices that the bartender is a Robot. The robot asks "sir what will you have?"

    The man replied "a martini please." The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had.

    The robot asked "what is your IQ?" The man answered about 160. The robot then proceeded to discuss the "theory of relativity, interstellar space travel and the latest medical breakthroughs".

    The man was most impressed so he left, came back and thought about a different tact. He once again ordered a martini. Again it was superb.

    The robot asked "what is your IQ?" The man answered "oh about 100." So, the robot started discussing Nascar racing and baseball scores."

    The guy had to try this one more time so he leaves and comes back. He ordered another martini and once again it was excellent.

    The robot asked the man "what is your IQ." The man replied "oh, about 50."

    The robot clicked his heels then leaned close and very slowly asked,

    "A-R-E Y-O-U P-E-O-P-L-E S-T-i-L-L H-A-P-P-Y W-I-T-H O-B-A-M-A?"
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