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  1. #1 Wednesday Title Match. 
    We're clear and cold this morning at 31 F but things will warm a bit later. Turkey Day is around the corner and I haven't even thought about it yet. :eek:

    TOTD: Courtesy titles such as Ma'am, Sir, and even the highly subversive Mrs. - do you use them? Do they freak you out?

    I was with someone the other day and we were getting some excellent advice from a retail clerk when he made the fatal "error" of addressing my friend as Ma'am. She went into a long and tedious explanation that he wasn't to call her that, that it made her think of her mother, etc., etc. It was embarrassing. When the clerk glanced at me, I rolled my eyes.

    I've witnessed this before, "Don't call me Mr. Smith - Mr. Smith is my father!" and similar outbursts. It can be really tricky when women who take their husband's last name reject "Mrs." socially.

    I'm wondering why some people get so offended at the use of these minor titles. It seems kind of childish to me. Bonus question: do you let total strangers first-name you if they've gotten your first name from a form? Sometimes I do but I can't say that I like it. It feels manipulative instead of friendly.
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  2. #2  
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    I'm old enough that I will err on the side of formality rather than informality. Fortunately, my friends raised their children the same way, so they refer to me as "Mrs. ..." unless I specifically request them to be more informal with me.
    "Today, [the American voter] chooses his rulers as he buys bootleg whiskey, never knowing precisely what he is getting, only certain that it is not what it pretends to be." - H.L. Mencken
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    Senior Member Rebel Yell's Avatar
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    It all depends on the age of the person I'm addressing and how well I know them. When first meeting someone older than me, it's strictly Mr. or Mrs. After I get to know them I may call them by their first name, but will always call them sir or ma'am.
    I feel that once a black fella has referred to white foks as "honky paleface devil white-trash cracker redneck Caspers," he's abdicated the right to get upset about the "N" word. But that's just me. -- Jim Goad
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebel Yell View Post
    It all depends on the age of the person I'm addressing and how well I know them. When first meeting someone older than me, it's strictly Mr. or Mrs. After I get to know them I may call them by their first name, but will always call them sir or ma'am.
    Same here. I think if a woman told me not to call her Mrs or ma'am; I would ask her how about bitch. For a man, it would be asshole. You can bet these dipshits are some very unhappy people.
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    Senior Member GrumpyOldLady's Avatar
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    I don't call anyone ma'am or sir. It's subserviant.

    I was sickened when I saw people down south making their kids say it to them.

    Dad or mom is loving and great .. but the endless "call me sir or I'll beat your butt' was awful IMHO.

    And I don't care if it's the culture there ...

    That'll tick off the southerners .. but that's the way I saw it.
    If leftists didn't have double standards, they'd have no standards at all.
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    Senior Member Rebel Yell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GrumpyOldLady View Post
    I don't call anyone ma'am or sir. It's subserviant.

    I was sickened when I saw people down south making their kids say it to them.

    Dad or mom is loving and great .. but the endless "call me sir or I'll beat your butt' was awful IMHO.

    And I don't care if it's the culture there ...

    That'll tick off the southerners .. but that's the way I saw it.
    It's not about subserviance, it's about respecting your elders.
    I feel that once a black fella has referred to white foks as "honky paleface devil white-trash cracker redneck Caspers," he's abdicated the right to get upset about the "N" word. But that's just me. -- Jim Goad
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    Senior Member GrumpyOldLady's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebel Yell View Post
    It's not about subserviance, it's about respecting your elders.
    No .. it's a power thing.

    I understand that the southerners claim it's 'respecting your elders'.

    They probably believe it.

    But it's cold and distant and you can be respectful while saying 'dad' or 'mom'.

    I think it's awful.
    If leftists didn't have double standards, they'd have no standards at all.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebel Yell View Post
    It's not about subserviance, it's about respecting your elders.
    True. "Call me sir or I'll beat your butt" is hardly the way to get respect, but that particular example sounds rather trailer-park.
    "Today, [the American voter] chooses his rulers as he buys bootleg whiskey, never knowing precisely what he is getting, only certain that it is not what it pretends to be." - H.L. Mencken
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    Senior Member GrumpyOldLady's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by linda22003 View Post
    True. "Call me sir or I'll beat your butt" is hardly the way to get respect, but that particular example sounds rather trailer-park.
    I got stuck living in Alabama for a decade.
    I heard those remarks from people on the playground.
    Middle class .. white ...
    One mother refused to even look at her poor 3 year old daughter unless she said 'ma'am' first.
    Her hubby was a 'well educated' lawyer.
    If leftists didn't have double standards, they'd have no standards at all.
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  10. #10  
    Senior Member Rebel Yell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GrumpyOldLady View Post
    No .. it's a power thing.

    I understand that the southerners claim it's 'respecting your elders'.

    They probably believe it.
    But it's cold and distant and you can be respectful while saying 'dad' or 'mom'.

    I think it's awful.
    If you say sir or ma'am to someone and you believe that you are respecting your eldres, then you are probably showing respect.

    I can easily overpower a 90 year old man, but I still call him sir.
    I feel that once a black fella has referred to white foks as "honky paleface devil white-trash cracker redneck Caspers," he's abdicated the right to get upset about the "N" word. But that's just me. -- Jim Goad
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