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  1. #1 Intercourse Judge Hands Loaded Nuts To Women. Women Unamused. 
    Judge Stuffed Acorns With Condoms
    Jurist nabbed for handing his nuts to several unsuspecting women

    UPDATE: Click here to see a photo of the condom-stuffed acorns

    SEPTEMBER 29--A Pennsylvania judge from the village of Intercourse is facing a disorderly conduct charge for allegedly approaching women near the state Capitol and handing them acorns he had hollowed out and stuffed with condoms, according to cops.

    When confronted by officers last Tuesday, Isaac Stoltzfus, a District Court judge, claimed the bizarre incident was a joke.

    According to a September 21 citation issued by Capitol Police, Stoltzfus, 58, “did conceal condoms in acorns and then gave them to women who were offended when they discovered the contents.”

    The citation does not disclose the size of the acorns Stoltzfus passed out, or whether the condoms had been used.
    Bonus point (for the other guys): Judge is a Republican. :p

    TSG
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  2. #2  
    The big Cheese
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    One does not greet death when he knocks at your door.

    Nay you repeatedly punch him in the throat as he slowly drags you away.
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  3. #3  
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    I find his actions insulting and in bad taste. However, if he is guilty of a crime why are not public school teachers guilty of handing out condoms to students. What's worse, handing out condoms to kids or to adults? How about another liberal favorite of teachers handing out books concerning homosexuality.
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  4. #4  
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    Those whacky Amish are at it again!
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  5. #5  
    Senior Ape Articulate_Ape's Avatar
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    My wife and I were in Lancaster, PA last fall and visited Intercourse. All I could think at the time was whethere there was a hospital there and how funny it would be to be able to list Intercourse as your birthplace. :D
    "Our president delivered his State of the Union message to Congress. That is one of the things his contract calls for -- to tell congress the condition of the country. This message, as I say, is to Congress. The rest of the people know the condition of the country, for they live in it, but Congress has no idea what is going on in America, so the president has to tell 'em." ~ Will Rogers
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  6. #6  
    I'd sincerely like to know what the guy was thinking. Was this an elaborate sexual overture? A warning? A multilevel punning statement?
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  7. #7  
    Senior Member Jumpy's Avatar
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    What a weirdo... I havent been reading my local newspaper lately, so I havent seen anything about this.
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  8. #8  
    Quote Originally Posted by Jumpy View Post
    What a weirdo... I havent been reading my local newspaper lately, so I havent seen anything about this.
    Keep us updated on any local angles. :D
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  9. #9  
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gingersnap View Post
    I'd sincerely like to know what the guy was thinking. Was this an elaborate sexual overture? A warning? A multilevel punning statement?
    It was his inner, horny squirrel coming out. :p
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  10. #10  
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gingersnap View Post
    I'd sincerely like to know what the guy was thinking. Was this an elaborate sexual overture? A warning? A multilevel punning statement?
    I'm trying to figure out how he got the condom inside the acorn!
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