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  1. #1 The hardest part about quitting drinking? Dating 
    The hardest part about quitting drinking? Dating

    After one too many hangovers, I decided to swear off alcohol. I didn't know I'd be giving up women, too
    By Joe Berkowitz

    "Do you just like Diet Coke a lot?" my date asked.

    I considered each of the dozen excuses I'd prepared for such a question, but finally I settled on the most straightforward answer: "I'm kind of not drinking right now."

    Everyone at the bar kept talking loudly; we did not. Melissa seemed to require more information, and so I offered it, trying to look casual and comfortable in a way I didn't feel. "I wasn't forced to stop or anything," I said, smiling. (Did that sound defensive? Like I was hiding something?) It was my first dry date, and it was going to be a long night.

    A month earlier, I realized it was time to take a break from alcohol. My reasons were probably what you'd imagine. I simply liked drinking too much, and I did not know my limits. It wasn't any dramatic event that made me want to stop, but rather a series of recurring regrets. After a particularly horrendous hangover, I decided to cut out drinking indefinitely. But while sobriety was great for my health, and my head, it was proving bad for my dating life.

    Before I quit drinking, meeting girls was easy: I met them in bars, a place in which, as a young, social New Yorker, I spent a fair amount of leisure time. And that's where I was, sipping my Diet Coke, when I met Melissa. We hit it off right away, despite the fact that she was at least two sheets to the wind (possibly three). I enjoyed our conversation, but I realized the first problem with meeting girls sober in places of drunken revelry: You feel weirdly guilty. Our exchanges were unevenly matched. She was overly enthusiastic, loud. Her eyes betrayed a lack of comprehension at times. Was it predatory to hit on this girl? Then again, if I wouldn’t have cared before, why stop now? So I got her phone number anyway.

    I could have just lied on our first date, although that seemed dodgy, an unpromising start to a possible relationship.

    "It's totally fine if you drink," I said. "You can drink all you want." I immediately regretted that. It sounded so creepy, like I was encouraging her to get wasted.

    "It doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother you," she said, surprisingly casual, and sipped her vodka tonic.

    By her third drink, having a conversation with her was like trying to play the game Telephone during a Sleigh Bells concert. I didn't want to be judgmental. I wanted to be the coolest sober person ever. But she kept sucking down vodka tonics, as if in defiance of arcane Prohibition laws, and as she got looser, I grew more anxious: Am I allowed to kiss her like this? Did I even want to?
    Very interesting - read the whole thing.

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  2. #2  
    Senior Member Apache's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Tree rats are watching you
    Bah that's the only thing to do in this podunk turdpile I live in...BARS...bars full of doorknobs....
    Government is not the solution to our problem, government is the problem.
    Ronald Reagan

    We could say they are spending like drunken sailors. That would be unfair to drunken sailors, they're spending their OWN money.
    Ronald Reagan

    R.I.P. Crockspot
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  3. #3  
    Zoomie djones520's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Ft. Campbell
    Kudo's on him for recognizing the need to stop though. I have known plenty in my time who couldn't recognize it.
    In most sports, cold-cocking an opposing player repeatedly in the face with a series of gigantic Slovakian uppercuts would get you a multi-game suspension without pay.

    In hockey, it means you have to sit in the penalty box for five minutes.
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