How Viagra can mess up your marriage

**Odysseus** · 04-26-2011, 02:03 PM

Originally Posted by Articulate_Ape

It depends on how well you secure the duct tape.

There's a difference between wanting and getting. Duct tape isn't necessarily an aphrodisiac.

A man was prescribed Viagra by his doctor who told him to take it one hour before sex. The man collected his prescription and went home to wait for his
wife to get in from work. An hour before she was due home, he took the Viagra pill.
...But just as he was expecting her, she phoned to say that she wouldn't be in for another two and a half hours.
In a panic, he phoned the doctor. "What should I do?" he asked. "I've taken the pill but the effects will have worn off by the time my wife gets home."
"I see," said the doctor. "It is a pity to waste it. Do you have a
maid?"
"Yes."
"Well, could you not occupy yourself with her instead?"
"But I don't need Viagra with the maid."

**Zafod** · 04-26-2011, 02:29 PM

Originally Posted by Odysseus

There's a difference between wanting and getting. Duct tape isn't necessarily an aphrodisiac.

A man was prescribed Viagra by his doctor who told him to take it one hour before sex. The man collected his prescription and went home to wait for his
wife to get in from work. An hour before she was due home, he took the Viagra pill.
...But just as he was expecting her, she phoned to say that she wouldn't be in for another two and a half hours.
In a panic, he phoned the doctor. "What should I do?" he asked. "I've taken the pill but the effects will have worn off by the time my wife gets home."
"I see," said the doctor. "It is a pity to waste it. Do you have a
maid?"
"Yes."
"Well, could you not occupy yourself with her instead?"
"But I don't need Viagra with the maid."

lol

JB · 04-26-2011, 02:47 PM

Originally Posted by Zafod

only a few woman want more than a half hour of sex.....

I give 'em four minutes whether they like it or not. I'll bump it to six if she puts a sammich on the nightstand.

**Bubba Dawg** · 04-26-2011, 08:05 PM

I'm thinking outside the box here.

An erection lasting 1 1/2 to two hours.....

I remember hearing about a coffee maker for a military aircraft that was supposed to be a really tough coffee maker.

It would continue working even in extreme conditions of temperature and g-forces that were so severe that the coffee maker would continue to be working in conditions so severe that the crew would long ago have died.

Point is, Personally, I don't think i would survive a two-hour love making session. The rest of me would be dead and the....coffee maker.....would still be working.

**Articulate_Ape** · 04-26-2011, 08:51 PM

Originally Posted by Bubba Dawg

I'm thinking outside the box here.

An erection lasting 1 1/2 to two hours.....

I remember hearing about a coffee maker for a military aircraft that was supposed to be a really tough coffee maker.

It would continue working even in extreme conditions of temperature and g-forces that were so severe that the coffee maker would continue to be working in conditions so severe that the crew would long ago have died.

Point is, Personally, I don't think i would survive a two-hour love making session. The rest of me would be dead and the....coffee maker.....would still be working.

Heh. :D

**Articulate_Ape** · 04-26-2011, 08:54 PM

Originally Posted by Odysseus

There's a difference between wanting and getting. Duct tape isn't necessarily an aphrodisiac.

Of course it isn't. That's what the porn videos are for. I'm not as young as I once was, if you know what I mean.

**fettpett** · 04-26-2011, 08:59 PM

Originally Posted by Articulate_Ape

Of course it isn't. That's what the porn videos are for. I'm not as young as I once was, if you know what I mean.

thats what the viagra is for ;)

**Articulate_Ape** · 04-26-2011, 09:05 PM

Originally Posted by fettpett

thats what the viagra is for ;)

Am I in the mate tricks? Morpheus? WTF?

**Madisonian** · 04-26-2011, 09:13 PM

Originally Posted by Articulate_Ape

Of course it isn't. That's what the porn videos are for. I'm not as young as I once was, if you know what I mean.

Warning... graphic:D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pgN5sFeYcjI

Just for you buddy!

**Odysseus** · 04-26-2011, 09:35 PM

Originally Posted by Bubba Dawg

I'm thinking outside the box here.

An erection lasting 1 1/2 to two hours.....

I remember hearing about a coffee maker for a military aircraft that was supposed to be a really tough coffee maker.

It would continue working even in extreme conditions of temperature and g-forces that were so severe that the coffee maker would continue to be working in conditions so severe that the crew would long ago have died.

Point is, Personally, I don't think i would survive a two-hour love making session. The rest of me would be dead and the....coffee maker.....would still be working.

Puts whole new meaning to the term "automatic drip."

Originally Posted by Articulate_Ape

Of course it isn't. That's what the porn videos are for. I'm not as young as I once was, if you know what I mean.

None of us are, but it beats the alternative.

Originally Posted by Madisonian

Warning... graphic:D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pgN5sFeYcjI

Just for you buddy!

Ah, hot monkey love. Once you go baboon, you never go back.