Taverner (1000+ posts) Mon May-16-11 11:50 AM
Original message

Help! Anyone here know how to pass a urine test?

Everyone's trying to sell the product out there, and from what I heard most solutions don't work

Does anyone have a sure fire way to beat a urine test? I've heard of the "fake penis" method and that seems like the most fool proof, but does anyone have experience doing this"?
Oh brudder.
The Velveteen Ocelot (1000+ posts) Mon May-16-11 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
3. Don't use drugs or alcohol before taking the test. Sure-fire win.
:eek: Common sense from a DUmmie?!?!
Taverner (1000+ posts) Mon May-16-11 11:55 AM
Response to Reply #3
13. Yes I know, but let's just say I'm a heavy smoker
and let's just say that I have a fully legal perscription
Suuurree.
sufrommich (1000+ posts) Mon May-16-11 11:58 AM
Response to Reply #13
19. If you have a legal prescription, what's the problem?
Don't they ask for your list of prescriptions before the test?
Taverner (1000+ posts) Mon May-16-11 12:15 PM
Response to Reply #19
47. Apparently the company doesn't honor said perscription
Which sucks.

I want to dump my own specimen on RReagan's goddamn grave right now...
TA DA! It's Ronald Reagan's fault that his perspective employer doesn't want some looser pothead for an employee.

Webster Green (1000+ posts) Mon May-16-11 12:24 PM
Response to Reply #33
59. I've had places that wanted to hire me, but my pot use prevented it.
A couple of times, employers wanted me, but their insurance demanded a drug screening of employees. It was just frustrating for both of us. I tell them up front that I smoke like a Rasta and don't plan to stop.

Once time in Florida, a temp company supplying construction workers hired me on as a metal framer, but the guy gave me 5 weeks to clean up for the test, since I told him I smoked a lot of pot. I wanted the job bad, so I chilled on the pot for awhile till I passed the test. The jobs I worked on were huge projects, and a lot of workers got baked during breaks and at lunch. The parking lot smelled like Woodstock at lunchtime.
Yeah. Nothing like hanging steel while stoned. That's not a recipe for disaster or anything.




By far the best post in the thread:
Vinnie From Indy (1000+ posts) Mon May-16-11 12:25 PM
Response to Original message
61. You could pee on your prospective employers desk
and tell him that if he wants to test your piss to have at it. It is very important that you slam the door on your way out while loudly humming the Battle Hymm of the Republic.
HHHHAHAHAHAAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAAAA!!!!!