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#1 North Miami Beach employees in hot water over alleged Santeria birdseed plot
12-02-2011, 03:10 PM
A note to prospective municipal employees: If you’re looking for a way to help out beleaguered colleagues, casting a spell on your boss is probably not the way to go.
Two North Miami Beach employees — one a police officer, the other a department office manager — are in hot water after trying to enlist some supernatural aid in the form of what they believed to be a Santeria practice.
Their alleged target: City Manager Lyndon Bonner, whose plan to slash the police budget prompted protests and union outrage this fall.
Their mystical material: handfuls of birdseed which, according to an internal affairs report, they hoped to scatter in and around Bonner’s fourth-floor office at City Hall.
But when they tried to recruit a janitor to sprinkle the seeds, she balked — and turned them in.
Officer Elizabeth Torres told investigators she meant the manager no harm: “I want to clarify, that it’s nothing malicious and nothing intended to hurt that person.”
More from Nadege Green here.
Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil;
Who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness;
Who substitute bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter!
21 Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes
And clever in their own sight! Isaiah 5:20-21 NASB
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12-02-2011, 05:58 PM
Where else in America, but Florida, would sprinkling magic birdseed around be considered a good plan? :D
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12-02-2011, 06:09 PM
Santeria is for wusses. All they do is sacrifice animals to their gods and burn lots of candles. Occasionally they murder cops, and then Lt. Castillo has to go see Eartha Kitt for advice on how to deal with them.
Voodoo, on the other hand, practices the animal sacrifices while it's celebrants are high on hallucinogens. Voodoo practitioners make zombies out of their enemies. Not only that, one of the first times Voodoo was used in a large-scale way was to kill the french in Haiti. And, if you really piss them off and send Roger Moore to deal with them instead of Sean Connery , Geoffrey Holder will emerge from a hole in the ground and blow your ass away.
I learned everything I know about Santeria and Voodoo from the movies and Miami Vice.
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#4 I thought this was the 21st century....
12-03-2011, 07:04 PM
....but maybe I was wrong. Another "You can't make this up" item...
http://miamiherald.typepad.com/naked...seed-plot.htmlNorth Miami Beach employees in hot water over alleged Santeria birdseed plot
(snip)
Two North Miami Beach employees — one a police officer, the other a department office manager — are in hot water after trying to enlist some supernatural aid in the form of what they believed to be a Santeria practice (a mix of voodoo and Catholicism from Haiti).
(snip)
Their mystical material: handfuls of birdseed which, according to an internal affairs report, they hoped to scatter in and around Bonner’s fourth-floor office at City Hall.
(snip)
Four boxes keep us free: the soap box, the ballot box, the jury box, and the cartridge box.
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