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  1. #1 #04 Top DUmmie of 2011 
    Senior Member franksolich's Avatar
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    Congratulations to DainBramaged, who attained #04 Top DUmmie of 2011, moving up from #07 in 2010, his first and only other appearance in the top primitives.

    Over the course of the year, decent and civilized people became better acquainted with the brain-damaged primitive, who revealed himself to be a single guy, aged 58-59 years, 5’10”, and circa 240 pounds. Probably some carbuncles and haemerrhoids. Eyeglasses. A perpetually-sour grimace in his mien.

    He also revealed that he lives in the reddest county of New Jersey—probably finds the cost of living, and taxes, lower there, plus less corruption and crime and violence, for which he should be grateful but perversely isn’t.

    The brain-damaged primitive is an independent “businessman,” running some sort of internet web-site out of his home dealing with the automotive industry. I dunno in what respect, only that his bonfires on Skins’s island betray that he does in fact know something about the motor vehicle business.

    But beginning January 3, 2007, business, whatever its nature, started declining and has slipped precipitously since January 20, 2009; the brain-damaged primitive, once prosperous, is now living pretty close to the edge. One wonders who’s to blame for this.

    DainBramage alleges himself to actually and truly be brain-damaged, ostensibly as a result of professional medical removal of sections of that organ within him. As a result, some decent and civilized people, feeling sorry for him, are hesitant to say anything bad (“bad” = “accurate”) about him, but they shouldn’t be.

    There’s plenty of brain-damaged people who conduct themselves with civility and courtesy.

    And maturity.

    I, personally, lost all respect and esteem in which I had held the brain-damaged primitive the morning I hung around Skins’s island, and saw him use “woggies.” The term seemed an endearing one, and it took me a while to figure out he was referring to…..dogs.

    This guy likes dogs—nothing wrong with that; we all do—but my eyes grew as big as saucers when seeing his comments on the matter, all this baby-talk used by someone who should’ve abandoned baby-talk like, 55 years ago. He makes the adult male race look bad, using stupid baby-talk.

    It later developed that he also refers to cats, felines, as “kitties.”

    Talk about a lack of respect for our four-legged friends.

    The brain-damaged primitive is giving the 60-year-old defrocked warped primitive, with a face like Hindenburg’s, a run for first place in her own use of baby-talk, especially in regards to items of food and the main food-absorbing organ.

    One’s not compelled to feel sorry for a near-senior-citizen guy using baby-talk.
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  2. #2  
    Senior Member franksolich's Avatar
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    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Mon Feb-14-11 02:36 PM
    Original message

    So I cut the cable (never on Fios, never on satellite, not in my house) to Cablevision and today a woman from their main offices called to ask me what my complaint was with the company. My response was simple, I've returned my equipment, satellite will be installed now that the ice and snow is off the building, you're too late.

    Dead silence. 10 seconds later, the begging started. And then I said goodbye. They waited too long, they don't think people will cut the cable. They are condescending and mistreat their customers. 55 MILLION people who have satellite can't be wrong.

    Arrogant fucks.
    Hero Member
    Posts: 8360

    I have $20 that says it was the cable company who cut Dain; probably for non-payment of the bill. The rest of the story, about the cable lady whining and pleading for Dain to come back, was probably the collection agent cussing the bastard out, etc.

    The rest is just more bullshit.,55393.0

    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Thu Apr-14-11 03:39 PM
    Original message

    The use of alerting to delete my posts is getting tedious

    Has this board become so thin-skinned and over-run by the correctness police that when ANYONE COMPLAINS ABOUT anything, POSTS GET DELETED. Never an explanation to try and correct it, even for the future, just broad brush deletions.

    Are we simply trying to sterilize DU, become the quiet left, voices squelched at every turn when the seagulls want to shut down threads or mob members to prevent alternative opinions? Union threads are attacked en masse, and when you voice a Pro-union, Pro-America position or open a thread celebrating same, the posts are deleted like bowling pins. EVERYTHING is an attack. And ya know what, that is unfair.

    It used to be fun here. Now it's becoming apparent that only one voice is supported.

    Thanks for reading. When you try and express this on the board, it gets deleted faster than you can say President Obama.
    EarlG ADMIN (1000+ posts) Fri Apr-15-11 11:21 AM
    Response to Original message

    1. Maybe if you stop personally attacking people the mods will stop deleting your posts.,58277.0

    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Sun May-15-11 09:25 PM
    Original message

    I bought a bag of Chip's Ahoy today, it's been a couple of years

    They used to be a paper bag with resealable folding wire closures with two rows in separate bags and weighed 22.5 oz.

    Today, a plastic bah with the 'resealable' adhesive top, 15.25 oz. and no individual wrappers on the rows of cookies. They are thinner and don't taste as good. And they cost $2.99, more than the old-style bag used to be on sale for only two years ago.

    The world is going to hell in a hand basket........
    Hero Member
    Posts: 6380

    Real things in life like power, gas, and food are at 15%+ inflation since the boy king started fundamentally changing America.

    If Obamy gets another four years the dollar will be worth ten cents and you will only get one chocolate chip cookie for $5.98. However, I know that the DUmbasses will vote for him no matter how bad things are and that somehow, some way the Obama's regime of incompetence will be Bush's fault.,59092.0

    DainBramaged Donating Member (1000+ posts) Sat Jun-18-11 12:21 PM
    Response to Original message

    19. I did pounds of acid in my youth, no flashbacks here.......,60704.0

    Hero Member
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    My mole is still a member in good standing. I recently made a reply to a comment made by DainBramaged. He never acknowledged it so it's safe to assume that he still has me on ignore.

    His ignore list is populated by pro gun posters. That's how I made his list.,62336.0

    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Thu Aug-11-11 02:59 PM
    Original message

    Survival of the fittest

    I work in a sea of asphalt. Our frontage is over a quarter mile. There is nothing green for nearly 500 feet behind us and to the right of the building I work in. My office/workshop is on the second floor. Looking out is a four lane highway and about a quarter mile that way is a river.

    Two weeks ago tomorrow I bought a one pound bag of pistachios from the nut man. He's been coming here (and hundreds of other businesses) for over 25 years. He's put two daughters through college selling nuts and candies to retail establishments and office buildings in my area.

    I like the occasional nut. Good for you and they make you work to enjoy them. So I left the bag on my desk over the weekend and came back Monday morning last week to find a small hole in the bottom of the bag. I didn't think much of it, and last week enjoyed my nuts a few times. This past Monday, the bag was on the floor and nearly empty. My bad I thought. I finished them and thought nothing of it.

    This morning I come in turn on my computer (one I built for me) and it starts making a racket. My computer is a very compact chassis Shuttle and takes up little space. I immediately turn it off, disconnect it and open it up on my workbench.

    It's FULL of pistachio shells and other assorted junk, half-eaten Reese's Pieces, the remainder of some Cheetos (yes, but I don't live in a basement). And tiny tiny tiny mouse turds. Smaller than a grain of rice by a large amount. I left a slot cover off the back to let the video card I use get a little more air, and that's how the bugger decided to get in AFTER climbing up my desk and pilfering my nuts and now taking up residence in my computer. How he got here amazes me. But he found me and now mooches my nuts. Not much, enough to survive. I moved his "home" to the floor this morning, so it should be easier for him to go back if he chooses.

    I will not destroy him. Any creature who came this far and worked so hard to share my pistachios is OK in my book. I will get a trap that will not hurt him, buy him a home at PetSmart this weekend, and he can stay under my care as long as he wants.

    I think I'll call him Tweak.,63022.0

    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Fri Aug-19-11 11:47 AM
    Original message

    So Sept 1 we're changing health insurance companies, and oh by the way, your rates are going up

    For me from $82 a week to $126 a week. Oh and my drug co-pay on 4 of my drugs is up by 60% too so it's now going to cost $320 a month for my drugs.

    The good thing is we should be glad we still have health insurance.

    At the end of every week after all expenses and gas money for the week, I'll have $40 for food.,63331.0
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  3. #3  
    Senior Member franksolich's Avatar
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    DainBramaged Donating Member (1000+ posts) Wed Oct-19-11 11:05 AM
    Original message

    The IRS

    Earlier this year I was notified by Sony that my identification credentials may have been compromised because their on-line game system was hacked. Being that I hadn't been involved with them since playing a trial of Conan a lot of years ago I didn't sweat it. But the notifications kept coming from them to take precautions,blah blah blah. So I did.

    I posted a credit hold on all three of my credit reports and oh by the way, got a free copy of my credit report for doing so. And on the last page I saw it, an IRS tax levy for multiple tens of thousands of dollars. I nearly had a panic attack because I had no clue as to what was going on. So in May I took a vacation day, and went down to the IRS office (since you can't speak to anyone on the phone unless you get the super secret phone number because YOU owe them money.) to find out what's going on.

    Turns out, my 2004 (TWO THOUSAND AND FOUR) tax return never made it to the IRS. And what was amazing was instead of sending notices to the last address from my 2003 tax return, which would have been forwarded to my new address in 2005, they sent the notices of being late and where is your return, and we're going to get you to a post office box I never owned or was associated with. Now, you can only claim refunds going back three years, but the IRS can get you for back taxes for seven years. In November of 2010 the IRS filed the tax levy (meaning they think I owe them but they hadn't garnished any assets yet) still sending notices to the PO box I never owned, and even though they kept getting 'not at this address' from the post office, they never gave up.

    Leaving the office I was completely panicked. I didn't know if I had any of my files left from 2004, and the accountant who did my taxes that year was long ago out of business, so I was between a rock and a fireplace. I received a certified notice on September 8th that on October 8th they were going to file to attach any property I own and any salary I made and oh by the way I could go to the hearing in Rochester NY. (By this time you have to imagine how I felt). Here I am 60, one of the working poor, I have to decide each week between food and medicine, and they want $30+ thousand dollars or I'm basically dead. I live in an apartment, I am paying for my car, my IRA is long gone, and our new health-care (?) plan at work now costs $126 a week for ME and my medicine co-pays went up 50% and anything we do now has a 20% co-pay (ownership is not very pleasant).

    I got them to give me another month, actually till tomorrow to find someone to recreate my 2004 return. I had found my copy of the 2004 return showing I lost money and owned no taxes, but I no longer had the documentation attached. I went through dozens of boxes of files and finally found some of the 2004 receipts and journals. It was something, but now I had another problem. No one wanted to help. 20 accounts, no one had software to do 2004. I'm screwed royally now. Two weeks ago I'm in an absolute panic when I talked to a friend to turned me on to his accountant. I met with them last Thursday.They would help as best they could, but his 'help' wasn't going to come cheap. $800 to recreate my 2004 tax return. And I have $134 in the bank.

    He let me pick the return up yesterday. I gave him $100, had to pledge to give him $200 a moth for the next three months plus a final payment of $100 at 22% interest annual or he would sue me if I didn't pay him. What a great guy. And to top it off, I wound up owing over $8000 still. We couldn't find the last quarter of 2004 and a few credit card statements I needed for expenses. Jesus it's SEVEN YEARS AGO and the IRS wants mu blood from a stone.

    I called the IRS last night, and talking to the agent I finally broke down, the nightmare isn't over. Once they get the returns, they'll cancel the levy and re-calculate the fines and penalties for being late and I'll have to work out a payment plan for the rest of my life. And that's on a net of about $50 a week after all of my expenses. And trust me, I have no more luxuries in my life, even Netflix is gone. My life officially sucks. I can't even give my beautiful daughter a Christmas present this year. And they won't give me a raise at work. A measly $100 a week, yet they hire 'managers' at the drop of a hat. I mailed the return this morning.

    We're not GE. They will do it to any of us. God only knows why my return got lost in the first place. the IRS made a number of mistakes, and why they decided to come after me for this on the last day before the 7 years expired is beyond my understanding. Maybe the one agent I talked to last month said it all. "We have to get it from somewhere", and when you can't afford a lawyer or tax expert, or GE, they get it from us.

    Thanks for reading.
    DainBramaged Donating Member (1000+ posts) Wed Oct-19-11 06:04 PM
    Response to Reply #6

    11. (sigh) this was from when I operated my own IT service 7 years ago

    Withing two years of starting my business I was undercut so much by the H1B visa insourcing firms I had to fold up shop, and my market was Auto dealers. At one point because of my familiarity with their business models and software, I was getting $95 dollars an hour and on call 7 days a week, but when you have to compete with a fucking scab offering to do what you do for $15 and hour within four hours of being called, I was out of business by 2006. And people wonder why I hate our jobs lost to the out/insourcing H1B visa workers. A couple of those dealers still call trying to get me to work on the side because they learned their lesson, but I have a non-compete where I work so I can't enhance my meager salary........,65821.0

    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Fri Oct-21-11 11:15 AM
    Original message

    It's bad enough when the IRS fucks up and you have to pay, but then getting hit by a drunk driver...

    So a couple of days ago I posted the story about the IRS and their dogged pursuit of the working poor to make up for the losses of the corporations.

    Almost within a week of having to handle the IRS, on a sunny Sunday morning in mid-September right before noon I hear this horrific noise outside of my apartment, I look out my window and see this red something or the other coming to a halt in the middle of the street. My immediate thought was that there was an accident via collision with another vehicle coming out of the side street. I got on the phone with 911 and as I got to the street, there weren't any other vehicles except a destroyed Ford Escape sitting in the middle of the intersection with a man slowly getting out. Pausing I turned and realized he had hit my car and my best friend's car, bad.

    My friend's car took the brunt of the damage, being pushed back almost ten feet and up onto the sidewalk. His estimate is $8,000. It's an '07 G6 convertible. Mine sustained $4500 damage, it's an '07 Cobalt SS.

    The DRUNK who hit us apparently fell asleep at the wheel at 11:30 in the morning and side-swiped our cars. The amazing part was he was functioning immediately after the accident and unhurt. The police put him in the cruiser when they arrived and immediately arrested him for impaired driving, reckless driving, and a Host of other charges. His car is totaled by the way. Lucky he had active insurance. I don't have rental or road service, and couldn't afford the difference if I did. When my friend's car is finished in the nest two weeks, mine goes in and I get to be taxied.

    When he was brought down to the station and given a breathalyzer test AN HOUR after the accident, he blew a .25 . Yup, 3 times over the limit in NJ. We're sure it would have been a 3. at the scene. Its amazing he's alive, and is definitely a functioning alcoholic.

    Like they say God protects the drunks and little children, but someone has to pay for their stupidity.

    My life sucketh.,65811.0

    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Sun Oct-23-11 11:01 PM
    Original message

    The sad little basement dwellers at the Conservative Cave

    They must have run out of famous people to stalk......assholes, worry about important your lack of a viable Presidential candidate.
    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Sun Oct-23-11 11:06 PM
    Response to Reply #1

    3. These douche bags worry about us instead of the real problems of the world

    too much time on their hands or simply jealous. I vote the former......and more than a token jealously of us here.
    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Sun Oct-23-11 11:08 PM
    Response to Reply #2

    4. These are the kind of people who steal from little old ladies because they can and blame it on the Government.....
    Sr. Member
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    Wowzers, he really zinged us! What a witty guy he is.,65923.0
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  4. #4  
    Senior Member franksolich's Avatar
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    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Fri Nov-04-11 07:39 PM
    Original message

    Had my groceries disappear out of my car on the way home.

    My two favorite no longer available Target bags, one canvas one burlap, bread, Swiss cheese, three Stonyfield 32 oz yogurts, bag of Almond Joy minis for my lunches this week, Olivio, foot long turkey and swiss sandwich from the deli for dinner tonight, corn muffins, pumpkin donuts, bananas, eggs, pancake syrup and a 12 pack of Lipton citrus tea. $44 worth of groceries in total. And the bags had the bread and eggs visible under the light where I was parked.

    I work in a town where you don't really have to worry about stuff disappearing. I usually don't lock my doors where I get my lottery ticket, so I didn't tonight. There was a young guy in at the same time I was buying a candy bar, but with with change. Unkempt, and not clean looking. thin dirty jacket and skull rag on his head. He came in the back door almost simultaneously, went out the front into the area where I was parked after the cashier counted his change (OUT LOUD which was embarrassing as hell). He did not look like he was doing OK.

    Got my ticket, yakked with the cashier a few, looked at the new Car and Driver, went out to the car, opened the door, and noticed the bags were gone off my passenger front seat. I thought for a couple of minutes, and let it go. Anyone who is hungry enough to steal groceries needs them way way more than I do.

    I hope he enjoys the pumpkin donuts.......he needs them way way more than I do. And I hope he shares his good fortune with his friends or family. Even in one of the richest counties in America, we have a lot of people in need, but they get ignored.

    Have a nice evening.
    (after which it’s shown the brain-damaged primitive possibly “lifted” the tale from a similar tale told by another primitive some months before; the brain-damaged primitive was probably counting on the short-term memories of his fellow primitives, thinking they’d forgotten the earlier tale told),66294.0

    DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Fri Dec-09-11 04:18 PM
    Original message

    "Can you spare any change for food?"

    That comment stunned me as I exited my local supermarket earlier this afternoon. I turned, and there sitting as if everything was great on this sunny day, reading a newspaper like they belonged, was a young couple. First glance, well dressed, not dirty, no 'meth marks' on their faces. Neither smoking. He shaggy blond hair sticking out from under a ski cap, her dark hair under a hoodie. Nice coats, nice boots on both.

    "Is it for food or drugs and booze?"

    No sir (huh, sir, are you shitting me?) we're hungry and we have no money.

    You have split seconds to think how to respond without being hostile appearing or judgemental.

    "Can I buy you lunch?"

    YES sir, yes sir you can!"

    I had just come out of the market, $43.00 in food for most of the week. Fits in a couple of cloth bags. I had a $20 as the change.

    "I need to put this in my car, I'll be right back"

    OK, we'll wait."

    Polite, good teeth, pretty warmly dressed, but there was this edge, they didn't seem to be 'average' homeless.

    Stuff in the car, walking back. I think, what is it, stray dogs and cats, dozens of people coming in and out, they asked me. I'm no angel, but my angels keep me grounded.

    "Pizza good?"

    Yes sir, if it's hot, we're happy!"

    We walk down the mall to the pizza joint. "Where are you from?" Not around here sir."

    "Are you both older than 18?" " Yes sir, I'm 23, my sister is 21."

    Their names are Rich and Pat. I took it as truth. I have no reason to doubt them.

    We got to the pizza joint and found a booth. "How about hot subs instead of pizza, I'm sure you get that a lot?" Quick looks and a faint smile from his sister, "Yes sir, we'd like that, you can order for us."

    As I've stated before, we've not many 'poor' round these parts, it's one of the richest Puke counties in the US. I ordered them meatball subs and got them both drinks from the cooler. I spent $18.42 of my $20 bill. I'm the one who will be sucking down PB&J sandwiches this week, but that's OK.

    "Where are you from?" Quick glances, nods, and then " We're from Indiana, we've been trying to get South where it's warmer before it is too cold. Our Mom had some problems she can't fix, we couldn't stay."

    I sat speechless while they ate, it wasn't my place to ask any more personal questions. When you're poor and you HAVE to get out of your house, it's probably best. Their hair wasn't clean. Their hands were, but it was a while since they've showered.

    "I'm not trying to be a jerk, but you have nice clothes". " Oh, (laughing quietly) we just raided the clothing bins over there last night, folks throw away nice clothes around here. My boots are new, little big, but they're new."

    Living on the road in the richest country in the world and you're raiding clothing donation bins to stay warm.

    "How do you get rides, it's illegal to hitch around here." "We hang out where there are trucks and try and get a ride. It's not always pleasant, but we've made it here."

    "How long have you been on the road?" "Three weeks, three weeks."

    (disclaimer; we talked a lot more, just too much to write down. They never told me why they left, but they were genuinely good kids).

    After they finished, I told them I had to go, and asked it I could do anything else to help.

    "No sir, no sir, it's been a good day now"

    I got up, I shook his hand, his sister gave me a tentative hug, and I gave them this small compact LCD flashlight I carry to help me see when I'm walking at night. They didn't want to take it, but I insisted.

    I turned and walked out tears streaming down my wrinkled old face because there's nothing else I can do for them, I'm too poor myself. I only hope they make it ok, and I hope MY angel looks after them.

    Thanks for reading.,67451.0

    DainBramaged (34,028 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail

    One where's my ignore list, two where's my journal, three is there an ignore list here??

    Is my stuff being transfered or it this suppossed to be a fresh start for everyone?

    I am not happy.
    DainBramaged (34,028 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail

    2. That wasn't my question

    I know where my DU2 journal is, why isnult me, why isn't it being brought here?

    Or do those of us with a decade or more of posting on DU now become nothing but dust?
    DainBramaged (34,028 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail

    5. Meh

    You are one of the best. I see no reason why they will, another mod posted clean slate in another thread, I will nit be happy having 10 years of my journal archived, and my ignore list stripped especially since there are a number of posters who I despise and should not have to put up with viewing or having them decide my fate here.

    We have been sold out.
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    I've been wondering why the brain-damaged primitive's "ignore list" is so important, so valuable, so vital, to him.

    It's like he lost his 401K pension fund, or his car was totaled, or someone stole the family jewels.

    Surely he can remember who was on his damned stupid "ignore" list, and re-create it from memory.

    That is, unless it's a mile long or something.,67510.0
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  5. #5  
    eeeevil Sith Admin SarasotaRepub's Avatar
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    Ahhhh yes, the "groceries" story!!! :D
    May the FORCE be with you!
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  6. #6  
    Senior Member Dan D. Doty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SarasotaRepub View Post
    Ahhhh yes, the "groceries" story!!! :D
    I remember that one

    I bet if someone broke into his house and stole all his sh*t, Dain would be so happy he'd crap his pants.
    CU's Paranormal Expert.

    Keep your powder dry, your sword sharp and your wits intact.
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  7. #7  
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    The groceries/food stories have been regurgitated by the DUmmies for years. They may change one or two details to make it appear fresh.

    Creative thinkers, they are not.
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