I blame the gays for this. They destroyed marriage. If gays can get married, why would anyone else want to? Now we are seeing it come to pass.
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I blame the gays for this. They destroyed marriage. If gays can get married, why would anyone else want to? Now we are seeing it come to pass.
I noticed a long time ago that in almost every tragic news story about a baby or toddler being killed by shaking or beating, the perp was the live in boyfriend, usually not the child's biological parent. (a few were girlfriend, but mostly boyfriend) Stats like this one indicate that this sad trend is going to continue.
Note, step parents are not automatically wicked, contrary to the fairytales. But when there is a lack of commitment to the family, or a lack of paternal bond, genetic or otherwise, when that kid is jumping up and down on your last nerve, the temptation can just be too great for some people to overcome.
A live-in boyfriend isn't a step-parent. A step-parent is a parent by marriage, and a cohabitating boyfriend is, by definition, not married. You correctly identified the issue, which is commitment to the family. Someone who lacks that commitment and simply shacks up will see a child as something that gets in the way of his pleasure, while someone who has that commitment will see a child as a person to be nurtured, loved and raised. That's why marriage matters. Marriage is a commitment to the long haul, not just between a man and a woman, but between a man, a woman and the children that they will raise together.
Ain't it the sad, sad truth. These young unmarried mothers arrive at poverty's gate before they even know they are on the train. Then they desperately grab ahold of the first hand offered. And very, very often that first hand is offered because someone saw that child as proof of impending poontang.
Having a baby at 19 is now viewed as just part of being 19. If it were up to me I would force a vasectomy on all 14 year old boys. Then once they earned enough money to reverse it they could father children.![]()
As someone who often gets told that marriage can be accomplished through paperwork other than a marriage certificate (when it can't actually) , I would point out that the primary function of marriage regarding childbirth has been overcome by law and technology.
A woman no longer needs to be married for 9 months (preferably more than a year) prior to giving birth to designate the father and to legally bind him to the child.
A man no longer needs to socially acknowledge his acceptance of paternity. Lawyers and doctors can do it for him.
A disturbing trend in marriage and childbirth- which I have certainly noticed and perhaps others here have as well is the phenomenon of women who have a baby and then suddenly realize that their husband simply can no longer be tolerated. Isn't that convenient? Seriously, think about all of the younger couples you know, when did they get divorced?
I fairness, that's a statistical average which doesn't accurately reflect the situation. People who get divorced tend to get divorced multiple times making it appear that half of all marriages end in divorce. IN reality, more than half of all marriages do not end in divorce. Or so I have been told.
Every single parent that I know personally is raising his or her child in the extended family. What I find much more disturbing are the "nuclear families" in which the children barely know their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. My niece went to school with kids whose grandparents were visitors in their lives, rather than being a part of their lives. I have met grandparents who proudly proclaim (and this sounds so trashy, if they could only hear themselves) "I don't babysit. I raised my kids and they can raise theirs."
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