I'm a teacher, and I will be making the following announcement to all my classes tomorrow:

There's a controversy in the media over an assault on a gay student being called a "harmless prank." The student was pinned down, and his hair was forcibly cut. Let me be clear. Neither myself nor any staff at this school consider behavior like that to be a "harmless prank." We consider it assault. Do you understand?.......Do you have any questions?

I am leaning towards a bouncy...the pot must be getting to her head.