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  1. #1 Sensitive question 
    Senior Member
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    Jun 2008
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    If I'm at work or in a professional (or semi professional) situation, I don't like males talking about "tits" and "ass", among other terms. This goes for straight and gay men. In my experience, straight men are more sensitive to their language and are more polite in such situations. Gay men, on the other hand, feel free to say things like "Nice tits!" or "Your boobs look great in that shirt" in the same situations. To me this is just wrong and makes me very uncomfortable.

    Now this is just professional situations, not those among friends or lovers. What amazes me is that gay men are always trying to demonstrate to the world that they are really men but when they get with women, they think the rules don't apply to them. They can even be openly misogynistic and not feel a thing about it. However, if I were to say anything against their lifestyle (which I don't--ever) I could be admonished, censured, or lost my job for being a homophobe.

    Any thoughts? How do women here feel about this?
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  2. #2  
    Administrator SaintLouieWoman's Avatar
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    At my last job (worked there 23 years) there weren't, to my knowledge, any gay guys. The straight guys generally didn't say anything so direct to the women, other than one older guy who's still selling at the age of 72. He was the one who gave all of the trouble and had endless lectures given to him by HR and by the president. It's just that he did such a good job and had been there so long that he got away with it.

    I'd overhear the guys saying stuff (I was one of the few office equipment female sales reps), but they weren't overly obnoxious. There were so many much younger reps that they were pretty respectful.

    Actually, I've never had a gay guy make remarks like the ones you're describing. They generally were buddies. One guy I considered a friend who owned an upscale consignment shop. We'd talk quite a bit when I was in the store. He was an extremely nice person. Another gay guy was one of my best clients. He was so funny. People in my office always knew when we'd be talking over the phone, because I'd really be laughing (not at him, with him). I still talk to him once in a while. He was truly one of my best buddies. SR met him at a party at my office before I left St Louis and also liked him (or maybe he was just humoring me).
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  3. #3  
    Power CUer noonwitch's Avatar
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    Oct 2008
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    I work in a female-dominated office and the men here know their place.

    Although, I have a coworker/friend who will make comments to me about my body and clothing, but he's a friend and wouldn't say those things to someone he didn't know very well. We all suspect he's gay, but he claims to date women. Whatever, he should say he's gay even if he's not, because he'll get promoted more quickly than if he's straight.
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