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  1. #41  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Napoleon wannabes usually come up short.


    Credit Dagwood
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  2. #42  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    How does a fish always know how much they weigh?


    Because they have their own scales.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  3. #43  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    My attempt to use ‘beef stew’ as a password was rejected.


    It wasn’t stroganoff.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  4. #44  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    How does a fish always know how much they weigh?


    Because they have their own scales.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
    Reply With Quote  
     

  5. #45  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I just created a new startup. It’s an online dating site for chickens.

    I’m just doing it to make hens meets.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  6. #46  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Are glass coffins going to be the next thing?


    Remains to be seen.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  7. #47  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Someone threw a bottle of Omega 3 pills at me in H-E-B last night...


    ...luckily my injuries were only super fish oil.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  8. #48  
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    With all of the cancelations of the sports leagues around the world, the sports networks are looking into broadcasting the Origami world championships.

    It’ll be on paperview.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  9. #49  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar.


    “Get out of here!” shouts the bartender. “We don’t serve your type.”
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  10. #50  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve.

    It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte.

    And then everything crashed.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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