I agree about the generally wussiness of kids today. Bike helmets, safe playgrounds (which can't be as fun as the metal stuff I played on as a kid), pitching machines, elbow and knee pads for roller blading, and a lack of trans fat in the diet is making our children totally wimpy. When they do finally get their first major injury, it is that much more traumatic for them, because they never got all the little bumps and scrapes that most kids get growing up.
I think you've hit on something here. When I look back on it, we weren't tragically destroyed when our friends killed themselves drinking and driving because the adults around us took a low key, common sense approach to the facts. It was what they like to call "a teachable moment". How awful Bob died! Do you see what happens when you get plowed and drive? Don't be like Bob.
No grief counselors, no "sharing", no journaling - just get back to life and learn the lesson.