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  1. #11  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Beans and wieners for dinner every night! I'd ask the wife to cook something else but she's visiting our daughter in Poughkeepsie this week.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  2. #12  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    On the other hand, at least the diner still lets me order the businessman's lunch even tho I retired 8 years ago.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  3. #13  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    John Deere's manure spreader is the only equipment the company won't stand behind.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  4. #14  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    When I get a headache, I take 2 aspirin and keep away from children. Just like it says on the bottle.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  5. #15  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Instead of a sign that says ‘Do Not Disturb’, I need one that says, ‘Already disturbed, proceed with caution’.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  6. #16  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    A bird in the hand .......


    .... is worth $2 a pound
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  7. #17  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Atheists don’t solve exponential equations because they don’t believe in higher powers.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  8. #18  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    On a more serious note


    Retirement takes all the fun out of weekends.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  9. #19  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    How can you tell if bagpipes are out of tune?
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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  10. #20  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I just found out my wife doesn't trust me.

    She didn't tell me that.

    I read it in her diary.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
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