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  1. #21  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Why do riot police get to work early?

    To beat the crowd
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  2. #22  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    What's the best way to start an underwear presentation?

    Start with a brief introduction.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  3. #23  
    eeeevil Sith Admin SarasotaRepub's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Retread View Post
    Why do riot police get to work early?

    To beat the crowd

    MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
    May the FORCE be with you!
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  4. #24  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    What did the momma cow say to her calf when it was time to come in from the field?

    It’s pasture bedtime.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  5. #25  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    What did the mama melon say to her daughter when the girl wanted to run away and marry her boyfriend?

    “You cantaloupe.”
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  6. #26  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    What did the boy do when the dog was chewing his dictionary?

    He took the words right out of his mouth.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  7. #27  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    What do you call a keyboard with good morals?

    An upright piano.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  8. #28  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    How many college freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb?

    None. That’s a sophomore course.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  9. #29  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?


    A mechanic.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  10. #30  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    What made the newspaper blush?

    It saw the comic strip.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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