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  1. #41  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I like going to a steak restaurant and meating with friends.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  2. #42  
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    Everyone in the Swiss army owns a Swiss army Knife.

    That's why nobody messes with Switzerland.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  3. #43  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I was strolling the streets of Tokyo when I glimpsed Godzilla.

    As we passed, Godzilla jumped up and bit me on my knee.

    Celebrities are a lot shorter in person.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  4. #44  
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    What does idk stand for?

    Literally everyone I ask doesn't know.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  5. #45  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Kids, never make fun of having to teach your parents computer stuff.

    They taught you how to use a spoon and a fork.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  6. #46  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    A lady went into a hardware store and asked the clerk: “What’s the best thing to keep raccoons out of your garbage container?”

    The clerk answered: “A shotgun.”
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  7. #47  
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    My daughter made a new fettuccine dish.

    But I think it's pasta it's prime.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  8. #48  
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    You know all those people who say they found true happiness in their own backyard?

    All mine has is a backed up septic tank.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  9. #49  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I pointed to two old drunks sitting across the bar from us and told my friend, "That's us in 10 years."

    He said, "That's a mirror."
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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