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  1. #11  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Hey.”

    The horse says, “You read my mind, buddy.”
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  2. #12  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Some Texans are mingling at the bar when an Oxford graduate walks in. “Howdy, stranger,” one Texan says. “Where are you from?”

    The Oxford graduate answers, “I come from a place where we do not end our sentences in prepositions.”

    “Oh, I’m sorry,” replies the Texan. “Where are you from, jackass?”
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  3. #13  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    CHARLES DICKENS WALKS INTO A BAR AND ORDERS A MARTINI.

    THE BARTENDER ASKS, “OLIVE OR TWIST?”
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  4. #14  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Two men walk into a bar.

    You’d think at least one of them would have ducked.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  5. #15  
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    Philosopher Rene Descartes walks into a bar.

    The bartender says, "A nice chablis, Monsieur Descartes?"

    Descartes says, "No, I think not."

    And he disappears.
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