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  1. #51  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I wanted to be first in line for the large-size shoe sale, but Bigfoot beat me to it.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  2. #52  
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    Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  3. #53  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Why is the person who invests your money called a broker?
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  4. #54  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    have been diagnosed with CDO.

    It is like OCD, except the letters are in alphabetical order like they are supposed to be.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  5. #55  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I just bought expensive new speakers for my home theater.

    I hope it was a sound decision.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  6. #56  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I gave a little speech last week. I wasn’t worried when the folks in my audience begin to check their watches but when they stared shaking them to see if they had stopped I decided to cut it short.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  7. #57  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    3-5 alcoholic beverages a day may result in regrettable tattoos.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  8. #58  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I saw the most amazing magic trick yesterday.

    This guy was walking down the street and he turned into a coffee shop.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  9. #59  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    It’s frustrating beyond belief when you know all the answers and nobody bothers to ask.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. Gandhi
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  10. #60  
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    Is prime rib divisible?
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