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  1. #1 Have another round 
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    The Lone Ranger and tonto went into a bar and sat down to drink a beer.

    After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said "Who Owns the Big white horse outside?"

    The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and said, "I do....Why?"

    The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought You'd like to know that your horse is about dead outside!"

    The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside and sure enough Silver was ready to die from heat exhaustion.

    The Lone Ranger got the horse water and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better.

    The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run around Silver and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make him feel better."

    Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe" and took off running circles around Silver.

    Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to the saloon to finish his drink.

    A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and asks, "Who owns that big white horse outside?"

    The Lone Ranger stands and claims, "I do, what's wrong with him this time?"




    ....



    "Nothing, but you left your injun runnin!"
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  2. #2  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    The advantages of easy origami are two-fold.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  3. #3  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  4. #4  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    When my financial adviser suggested I invest my money in the market, I told her that I had no interest in bonds and put no stock in her advice.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  5. #5  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I was playing chess with a friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.” So we stopped playing.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  6. #6  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  7. #7  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Why are the most stupid always the most confident in their opinions?
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  8. #8  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    I wanted to be apsychiatrist but the thought of it made me shrink.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  9. #9  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    Two Texas Aggie state troopers at a traffic stop. One looks at the other and asks “What town is that?”

    Other said “Waxahachie”.

    “How do you spell that?”

    “Uhhh...beats me. Shoot, let him go and we’ll stop him in Waco.”
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

  10. #10  
    Ancient Fire Breather Retread's Avatar
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    VINNIE VEGAN: Anybody who sells meat is gross.

    CARL CARNIVORE: Anybody who sells fruits and vegetables is grocer.
    It's not how old you are, it's how you got here.
    It's been a long road and not all of it was paved.
    . If you ain't havin' fun, it's your own damn fault
     

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