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  1. #1 A Republican Prayer 
    eeeevil Sith Admin SarasotaRepub's Avatar
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    The Friday night drunk speaks again...


    Fri Jul 12, 2019, 09:53 PM

    NanceGreggs (24,726 posts)



    A Republican Prayer

    Dear Jesus:

    Please don’t hold it against me that I have turned my back on you, in order to worship a lying pussy-grabber who represents everything you find abhorrent.

    Please forgive me for supporting everything he says and does, from imprisoning and abusing innocent children, to ignoring your admonitions to welcome strangers and to treat others as we would be treated.

    Please hear my prayers, even as I refuse to hear the cries of those who are suffering at the hands of the man I have chosen to idolize.

    Please excuse my hypocrisy as I pretend to follow your teachings, while using your name to encourage others to do exactly the opposite of what you have taught us to do.

    Please find it in your heart to look the other way when I judge others based on their race, their religious beliefs, and their ethnicity, instead of judging them on the basis of what is in their hearts.

    Please do not take notice when I take the side of people who sow hatred and bigotry, and when I defend their actions and their words.

    Please show me the compassion I steadfastly refuse to show others, and provide me with the good health I would happily deny to those who can’t afford to pay for it.

    Please avert your eyes as I choose to see the world in terms of what is beneficial to me, instead of what is right and just for others.

    Please forget that I have abandoned every Christian principle I ever professed to believe in, and make a mockery of those principles by professing to still adhere to them.

    Please keep in mind that my defence of a cruel, totally corrupt madman is not a mindless choice, but a deliberate decision to choose him over You.

    Please put me first, despite the fact that I put the welfare of my country and my fellow citizens last.

    Please keep my family safe, happy, and secure, while I continue to support those who separate families and treat my fellow human beings like animals.

    Thy Will be done – as long as it doesn’t interfere with the will of Donald Trump, no matter how heartless, how corrupt, and how morally bankrupt he has proven himself to be.

    In your Holy Name, I beg your indulgence – or at least a free pass to heaven. I pray that when I face your final judgment, you will show me the mercy I have denied others, and will choose to forget how willing I have been to turn away from everything you are, and every Christian value you have taught me to uphold.

    We actually need more like Nance to post on DUmmieLand.

    Where has Pitt gone???
    May the FORCE be with you!
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  2. #2  
    Senior Member Tecate's Avatar
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    Okay, that has to be the best one I’ve ever read from her. There must’ve been a Holy Bible lying around near the empty bottle of Canadian Mist.
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  3. #3  
    Senior Member DumbAss Tanker's Avatar
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    I feel it's unfair to the rest of the week to refer to her as a 'Friday night drunk.'
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  4. #4  
    Festivus Moderator ralph wiggum's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DumbAss Tanker View Post
    I feel it's unfair to the rest of the week to refer to her as a 'Friday night drunk.'
    There is a catchy title somewhere to describe her drunken blather. Can't come up with one at the moment.
    Voted hottest "chick" at CU - My hotness transcends gender
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  5. #5  
    Power CUer SVPete's Avatar
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    Here's an example of what real Christians do, to which NanceGreggs (and many DU-folk) is willfully blind. Currently CityTeam is in San Jose, SF, Oakland, Portland, OR, and Chester, PA (knowing little of PA geography I resorted to Google Maps and found that Chester is basically a suburb of Philadelphia, about 6 miles up the Delaware River from Philadelphia Int'l Airport). CityTeam isn't unique, in the sense only-of-its-kind, they just happen to have a strong presence in San Jose, where I live and CityTeam was started. Beautiful Day is another Silicon Valley charity that organizes several thousand volunteers from multiple churches plus necessary materials into a wide range of projects (I linked the 2019 projects page).

    On a large, international scale, there's lots of Christian relief ministries to which NanceGreggs and many DU-folk work to be willfully blind or denigrate: The Salvation Army; Samaritan's Purse; Compassion International; World Vision; to name a very few.

    Maybe a DU-onlurker will see this post, and I ask him/her to pass on this very simple question: NanceGreggs, what do you, personally, do with your own hands and your own money (unfiltered by government)?

    I didn't plan it, but every one of the charitable ministries I mentioned above is among the relief charities to which my immediate family has contributed money and/or volunteer time (directly, not through government or our church).
    Facts don't matter to DUpipo.

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  6. #6  
    Festivus Moderator ralph wiggum's Avatar
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    Corn Flakes and Canadian Mist: Early Morning Buzz with Drunken Aunt Nance
    Voted hottest "chick" at CU - My hotness transcends gender
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  7. #7  
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    Thought they didn’t think God or Jesus existed?
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  8. #8  
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    I actually think it's a magnificent post.

    It manages to incorporate almost every liberal-socialist talking point into one screed.

    They sit around and play parlor games, where they try to do that.
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  9. #9  
    Senior Member cadillac shark's Avatar
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    Dear Jesus,

    Enemies of freedom still hate ya, looks like. Especially the false prophets wing. You already know what's gonna happen, but we'll get back to ya later anyway on it.
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  10. #10  
    Power CUer FlaGator's Avatar
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    You ask me to forgive my enemies, Jesus, and with time I think I can learn to do that. However, I have a difficult time forgiving your enemies and I will need your help, as with all things, with this.
    Cast your burden on the Lord,
    and he will sustain you;
    he will never permit
    the righteous to be moved.
    Psalm 55:22
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