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  1. #1 CNN: 'Our Ratings Are Only Tanking Because Trump Is Killing Off Viewers By The Millio 
    Festivus Moderator ralph wiggum's Avatar
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    https://babylonbee.com/news/cnn-our-...y-the-millions

    ATLANTA, GA—CNN host Brian Stelter blamed President Trump for the network's falling ratings Sunday, accusing the president of killing millions upon millions of people that otherwise might have tuned into CNN.

    "If Trump weren't killing off most of America by the millions, we'd still have a pretty solid viewer base," Stelter bellowed at the three viewers watching*Reliable Sources. "Airports, lobbies, waiting rooms, and gas station pumps are now playing CNN to absolutely no one, since Trump has killed them all."

    A guest on Stelter's show suggested that Trump has killed more people than Hitler, Mao, and Stalin put together, and Stelter had to agree. "I'd probably put his death count at somewhere near 7.7 billion," he said after doing some simple math on one of those giant novelty calculators he keeps handy for such an occasion. "We can't overstate the damage this president has done to this once-great news station."
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  2. #2  
    Power CUer FlaGator's Avatar
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    Hmmm, 7.7 billion? Current world population is around 7.46 billion.
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  3. #3  
    Senior Member Dlr Pyro's Avatar
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    Is babylonbee another site like The Onion?

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    "Even if Trump didn't pay Russian hookers to pee on one another to defile a bed the Obamas once slept on it sounds like something he would do and that's all that matters." DemocratSinceBirth, Wed Jan 11, 2017, 09:32 AM

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  4. #4  
    Festivus Moderator ralph wiggum's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dlr Pyro View Post
    Is babylonbee another site like The Onion?

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    Yes, absolutely.
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  5. #5  
    Festivus Moderator ralph wiggum's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FlaGator View Post
    Hmmm, 7.7 billion? Current world population is around 7.46 billion.
    Trump is just that powerful!
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  6. #6  
    Power CUer FlaGator's Avatar
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    Oops, didn't realize that was the Babylon Bee. Never mind.
    Cast your burden on the Lord,
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  7. #7  
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    Quote Originally Posted by FlaGator View Post
    Oops, didn't realize that was the Babylon Bee. Never mind.
    As I posted earlier today on FB, today's Babylon Bee satire article is next week's news. The Bee has become more of The Newspaper of Record than the NYT is.
    Facts don't matter to DUpipo.

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  8. #8  
    Festivus Moderator ralph wiggum's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FlaGator View Post
    Oops, didn't realize that was the Babylon Bee. Never mind.
    Still hope you found it amusing. Put this into the lounge for a reason.
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  9. #9  
    Senior Member old dog's Avatar
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    I realize that they are posted in The Lounge sub-forum but I am really getting tired of these bablyonbee posts.

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  10. #10  
    Power CUer FlaGator's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ralph wiggum View Post
    Still hope you found it amusing. Put this into the lounge for a reason.
    Love the Babylon Bee. Just hadn't read it in a couple of days. What is sad is that many of their articles sound possible in this day and age. I will buy most anything that is said about CNN because the truth is generally more ridiculous than the satire that is written about them.
    Cast your burden on the Lord,
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    Psalm 55:22
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